Over the past few years, God has started breathing a new wind in my soul. I feel unsettled with the way things are and have started to long for new wine skin. I think HE is ready to pour out new wine. I see it happening all over the world.
Perhaps he is transforming me into something new.
I have a lot to repent of.
I've made Christianity about me and how Jesus can help me feel good about my life. How he can take away my fears and discontentment and bad habits and make me a better person.
Now, I never would have said that's what I believed, what I had reduced the gospel to, but take a look at my life and personal pursuit of goodness is all you would see.
See, now I'm starting to think there's more to this gospel than personal sanctification. Personal sanctification, yes! But, good news for the world. News that transcends all issues of life, informs all we are and what we do. Informs who we love and who we pursue. News that BLESSES others. News that befriends the fatherless, defends the widow, clothes the naked, mows the lawn of the elderly neighbor and news that serves like our King did.
The church is not a gathering place on Sundays where I meet with my friends and learn about God. The church is a group of people on mission together to disciple one another and bring the good news to the whole world.
I'm not sure where I got the notion that I didn't really need to do this on a regular basis. Where I got the notion that doing a service project was the same as giving my life to God wholly and obeying his commands (whatever you did for the least of these, you did for me). Where I got the notion that my "church" either could be my life or that it could be separate from my life.
I'm scared. I don't exactly know what this will look like. I'm scared that I will get in the way and mess up relationships. I'm afraid I won't know how to share this good news that has changed my life, while still being friends with neighbors and enjoying life together. Jesus loved SO well. I want to learn to love my neighbor. And actually do it. As in, TODAY and tomorrow and the next day. I want to serve the needs of my community and world, NOW.
All I know is that this needs to be fueled by prayer.
Holy Trinity, help me love and serve as you did. Go before me and speak truth to me. Help me to balance discipleship with mission. Bring your kingdom to this earth. Bring it soon. In Your name I pray, AMEN.